5 Tips for Actively Listening
Nearly 2,000 years ago the Stoic Philosopher Epictetus noted that humans were given but one tongue and two ears, so that we might listen twice as much as we speak. Although Epictetus was not concerned about the success of salespeople, is clear that listening has been an issue for some time.
I have thought about my education from Kindergarten to High School to University. I did not take a class on listening; most likely because one was not offered. I am pretty sure my parents may have mentioned that I should “sit down and listen” a few times.
I do recall Mr. Dardanian in 12th grade English Comp class calling on me once when he knew I was not listening, but that did not help me understand how to listen. My wife definitely has referenced selective hearing, which is similar to the happy ears salespeople acquire.
However, I don’t recall anyone ever helping me listen. The only tip I remember was “close your mouth and open up your ears” which still does not resonate. So, how do we learn to listen better?
We get better at listening like anything else, practice.
I think active listening is the act of fully concentrating on what is being said and being present in the conversation, rather than just passively ‘hearing’ sounds. It must involve our mind processing the words into ideas.
Consultative Selling requires actively listening to qualified decision makers; asking questions to find compelling reasons for them to buy. Good questions, tough questions and great questions will help a salesperson uncover the problems that the salesperson can solve. However, it goes deeper.
The cadence of good, tough and great questions done conversationally causes the prospects to engage their mind. By slowly building your questions to keep uncovering the prospects compelling reasons to buy, the opportunity to close business is much easier. If the questions are not associated with compelling reasons, the sale is likely doomed.
Salespeople, not unlike “people”, often are just waiting to speak. This behavior is rude and unproductive and the antithesis of active listening. In 2018, we read or hear over 100,000 words a day, listening becomes one more thing on which we need to focus.
Try actively listening to your spouse, your child, a customer and a prospect or two. It just might have a positive effect on each of those relationships!
Here are 5 tips for improving active listening.
- Conversation. Fundamentally, a prospecting call or meeting is a conversation. Yes, the context is different than your friends at an event, yet it is a conversation. Treat it as such.
- Have the intent of learning. Next time you are with a prospect commit to asking questions with the purpose of learning about the prospects problems, joys and concerns. Don’t be contrived. If you are truly trying to understand, you cannot help but to get to learn.
- Pause. Practice for a day or even an hour pausing for 3 -5 seconds before responding in a conversation. 5 seconds will seem like an eternity, but it will force you to pay attention to your conversation partner.
- Go Slow to Go Deep. Salespeople are often more concerned with the outcome of a prospecting call, instead of the conversation. Slow down. Trust your process. (you have a process, right?) Pay attention to what the prospect is saying for clues and to learn their concerns.
- Remember Epictetus. The proportion of a salesperson talking to listening should be close to 70% listening and 30% talking. Use your words to encourage the prospect to talk.
